I'm still runnin'--yeah, yeah, yeah

Geesh, y'all! In the past two weeks at least twenty people have asked me if I'm still running or was the marathon it, the Big Kahuna, the One and Done, the Put in Fork in Me this Crap is for the Birds. Gawd! I'm addicted, don't ya know?!? Now this here blog, that's another story. I was mediocre at best when it came to updating the final weeks of marathon training. Now, fuggetaboutit.

But, I HAVE been running. Seventy miles since the marathon. Not too shabby, eh? Certainly not training mode but good enough for maintenance. Especially since I've been making a bunch of my short runs speedwork. Bleh, I hate speedwork! I've got my sights set on a few upcoming races: a 5k Turkey Trot, a five-miler in December, and the Frederick Half Mary again in May.

I'm still running, peeps, don't fret! Perhaps I'll even try to update here periodically. :p

The Grand Finale

Okay, time for the official race report!

When we decided to run the marathon together, Running Partner and I signed up with the 4:30 pace group. We figured that was very conservative for us because the minute per mile pace was a good thirty seconds slower than our usual long run pace. We got to the race site very early, used the bathrooms, checked our bags, ogled a few hotties, I mean checked out the competition, and made our way to the starting line with minutes to spare. Once the gun went off--hmmm, I assume there was a gun, I didn't hear it though--we were pumped with adrenaline. The first four miles or so of the course are uphill and we had no problem staying with our pace group. When the course transitioned to downhill, we admittedly picked up our pace probably a little too much. We never caught up to the 4:15 group though so I figured we’d be okay. I did ask Running Partner if we could slow down a couple of times but she really had to go to the bathroom and was hoping to bank some time so a pit stop wouldn’t affect our finish. In retrospect, that’s completely laughable.

We saw my parents at mile seven and I got a huge boost from that. I was still feeling great physically but had been starting to get kind of bored. (Crazy, I know.) I noticed Running Partner wasn’t talking very much and hadn’t been responsive to my conversation attempts but I figured that was because she still hadn’t found a bathroom (without a huge line in front of it) yet. We saw my parents again at mile 12—after a much-needed Port-a-Potty stop for RP—and again I got another emotional boost. My dad was holding a huge sign and screaming “Yes! You are AWESOME! You are AWESOME!” over and over again and my mom was screaming and taking pictures like she was part of the paparazzi. Running Partner finally spoke and said “Your parents are so great! Can they be mine for today too?” Then, another runner nearby said “I don’t even know you or your family but I want your parents to adopt me today.”

We crossed the half-way point at 2:13, well on our way to meeting our goal and still feeling really good. At least, I thought we were. Running Partner still hadn’t said much. I finally said “This is so boring when we’re not talking. Why aren’t we talking?” That’s when I saw the tears streaming down from behind her sunglasses. Apparently she had tweaked something in her hip around mile six and it had been getting progressively worse. Unfortunately we still had the toughest part of the course in front of us. I asked her if she wanted to stop, she said no. I asked if she wanted to walk, she said no. We trudged on to mile seventeen where she finally asked if we could walk. This was coming from the girl who never walked a single inch in any of our long runs so I knew it must be really bad for her to ask if we could walk during the actual marathon. She was crying pretty hard at that point. We were due to see my brother-in-law at mile twenty two and as we got closer I kept asking her if she wanted to stop with him and have him get a medic. Again, she said no.

When we did finally see BIL, I was so excited I started screaming and blowing kisses. Then I noticed he was pointing off to the side. My father-in-law had brought my three kids down as a surprise!!! It was the absolute highlight of my run! I stopped and hugged each one of them and posed for a picture. I was beaming! When I turned around to rejoin the race I saw Running Partner about twenty yards ahead. I sprinted to catch up with her and she was not doing well. The rest of the race is a blur of walking breaks and overwhelming concern for her well being.

I have to admit I reached my own personal low point at mile twenty-four when I threw up after taking a sip a Gatorade. The funny thing though is that I almost forgot to include that in the race report. What other sport pushes you to the point of puking and it doesn’t even seem worth mentioning?

Running Partner hung in until mile 25.8 when she declared she had to stop and wouldn’t be able to make it across the finish--the finish that we could literally see up ahead. This time I turned into the hard ass and told her dropping out was no longer an option. If she was going to quit, she should have done it long ago. I forced her to keep moving and we ran across the finish line holding hands at 4:48. (Insert sappy music and graceful tears here.)

She has thanked me several times for staying with her, which is just ridiculous. We’re running partners. We ran every long run together and committed to running the marathon together. I was not going to leave her. I truly did not care at all what time I finished. If I had to take an honesty pill, I’d probably admit that I had been hoping to finish in less than five hours. And I did! I’ve been riding a runner’s high since I crossed that finish line. It’s now forty-eight hours later and people keep telling me I’m beaming. It was definitely one of the top five experiences of my life. In fact, I’m secretly trying to figure out when I can run another one without my family turning against me.

As for Running Partner, she seems to be healing well. She couldn’t walk yesterday (the day after the race) but today she managed to hobble enough to go get a pedicure. That’s my girl!

Here's a photo taken soon after the finish. I'd like to say that's a glow of happiness and accomplishment rather than sweat. Better photos to come, no doubt. And, yeah, notice the slouched posture and crossed legs? It was an attempt to minimize the crippling hamstring and lower back cramps that seized me as soon as I stopped running.

Marathon Miles: 26.2

Total Miles: 502.2

Success is sweet.

I did it! Runner Girl is officially a marathoner!! More detailed updates to come but, for now, thanks to all those who offered support throughout the training period and out there on the course today. I don't think I could have done it without all of you! x0x0

Aaaaaaaaaack!

Did you hear that? My primal scream? Yes, folks, marathon freak out is in full-swing over here. So much so that I've intentionally been avoiding this blog and anything else remotely running related in life. (Except actual running, which I have been doing because I am going to be prepared for that marathon come hell or high water.)

Running Partner and I just got back from the marathon expo. I have my bib, I have my safety pins, I have my pace group registration, I have everything I need to get me through until 5 o'clock on Saturday--the official start time of our post-marathon keg party. Bring it on!! I'm hoping by focusing on a time long after the race will be over, I'll minimize the actual race anxiety. Yea, right.

One major piece of news from the past week: Running Partner and I have decided to run the marathon together. Y'all might have thought that was a given but then you're forgetting she's much faster and more competitive than I am. BUT, she's also afraid to go the 26.2 alone and, like a pimply teenager in prom season, she nervously asked me to run with her. She even suggested we join a conservative pace group. Love it! Love her! Of course I accepted.

So, we are set. I'll pick her up at 6 a.m. on Saturday and will hopefully post here later that day that I not only survived but actually finished the marathon on two feet.

This week's Miles: 17
Total Miles: 476

Hamsterin' It

Whoa--reunited and it feels so, hmmm, just okay? After about a ten-month hiatus, I rekindled my relationship with the treadmill, a.k.a hamster wheel, today. The lightning-filled skies, way-too-soon nanny interview, and way-too-long walk back from the bus stop worked in conjunction to form the perfect circumstances for me to channel my inner hamster. It's been so long, I almost forgot what the treadmill experience is like. To sum it up: fast and boring. Yeah, sorry to you regular TMers but treadmill speed is a whole nuther ballgame compared to road speed. I mean, Ms. Snail here was running sub 8-minute miles while singing along to her iPod AND asking her 5-year old runlet about her day at kindergarten. Ummm, yeah, I'm not that easily, breezily fast in life. BUT, and I do mean BUT, holy cow did I get bored!! (No offense to previously mentioned runlet.) Seriously, one TM mile has to equal at least two road miles, no? Did I say that right? Heck, I don't even know. All I know is that I was crizazy bored, like the boredest I've ever been in my life. And that's with music, television, and a small child to distract me. Girlfriend needs her some nature. And, another and, I do teach 12th grade English for any of you wondering. Don't worry though, I don't teach your kids! :)

Today's Miles: 3

Total Miles: 459

I've Got Spirit! Yes I Do!

Last night, Runner Partner, Supportive Neighbor, and I went to see Spirit of the Marathon. All I can say is that if you're planning a fall marathon and haven't seen it, get to steppin'!! It was beyond inspirational. RP, SN, and I were all shedding tears of joy, fear, sadness, wonder, you-name-it at the end. It gave me the boost I badly needed to get through these final days. Thank you, documentary gods!

Today's Miles: 4

Total Miles: 456

Phonin' It In

That was the m.o. today. Just run and get 'er done. Unfortunately that kinda sucks for six miles. When you're checking your Garmin and it's only been three tenths of a mile, you know you're in trouble. Blork. Yet I persevered. Even if I passed the time trying to figure out if I was bored, miserable, tired, thirsty, or still sore from Saturday--the time passed. Then I finally had that glorious moment. That hallelujah that all runners know and love. That moment when misery turns to bliss and you remember "Oh yeah, that's why I do this!" Too bad it occurred at 5.75 miles. Ah well, that final quarter mile rocked. (And I didn't cheat today and cut the mileage short even though I REALLY wanted to.)


Today's Miles: 6
Total Miles: 452

Taper Madness--Take 1

Ode to my shoes I love so well,
Even if you kinda smell.
You’ve seen me through so many runs,
Yet you remain a virgin to the starting guns.
But your time will come, I now know,
When the starting mat will be your “Go.”

Today’s forecast was nothing but rain
And I should have turned to Sir Squeak again.
After all, that sort of weather gave him his name
And a prominent squeak’s now his grating game.
But I chose you anyway, over him,
Hoping your odds of now squeaking were slim.


Then I stepped in a puddle on mile three.
(Doh!) Still ,you were so kind to me.
Nary a blister on my sopping feet,
After twelve drenching miles, that’s pretty neat!
I owe you so much, you rascally shoes,
So munch on this exciting news:


Dear footwear friends, will you join me soon
In running the Big Kahuna-hoon?
It’ll be an adventure, I can promise that.
All I ask is you make it to the final mat
Where we don our rewards and hug loved-ones so
Then head to the kegger and get on with the show.


Okay, maybe you’re not cute party gear.
How ‘bout hangin’ in my closet for a year?
Sweet Asics Gel Nimbus ( in a discontinued hue)
The expiration date on our training is due.
Thanks for the run--metaphorically and not
I’ll do what I can to make sure you don’t rot.

Today's Miles: 12

Total Miles: 446

A crazy dry throat, a little air guitar...

and I found my Nirvana. Or Bruce Springsteen, as the case may be. (We all know I love me some "Born to Run.") I've had the worst cold this week--thank you, high schoolers, for all the germs--and running has been the last thing I've wanted to do. But the training must go, right? So it was on Tuesday when I headed out, feeling like I was at death's door, and gave myself full permission to run just as far as I could and be happy with whatever the resulting distance might be. Somewhere, somehow, the endorphins must have taken over because lo' and behold, around mile four, I found myself blissed out. Literally, I started playing air guitar while I was running! How scary is that?!? I must have been febrile. I'll take it though. It was a great run

The same thing happened again on Wednesday (minus the air guitar, thank God) and my "I'm just going to phone something in here, ummm, how about two miles?" turned into the full eight Hizzoner Higdon had scheduled.

Then I skipped yesterday's run. Shhhh.


This week's miles (so far): 13
Total Miles: 434

The Big Kahuna: Run and Done!

Like a groggy bear emerging from his wintry lair, I'm just getting up from my post-run nap. That's right. I haven't taken a nap since the Reagan years but today one was most certainly in order. I mean, how else do you aptly celebrate running twenty miles?!? That's right, chili beans. I did it. I ran the Big Kahuna. The longest run of my training program. And ya know what, it wasn't so bad. In fact, I'm gonna make y'all gag and roll your eyes when I tell ya that Running Partner and I actually considered asking the marathon coordinator, who happened to be on site for this organized training run, if we could just run our 26.2 today and get our medals.

Ahhhh, now for the glorious taper. This is when the true madness sets in, I hear. Hold on to your boot straps, it could be a wild ride.

Today's Miles: 20 (!)
Total Miles: 421

The PBI

Ha, you're probably thinking "That silly Runner Girl doesn't even know it's 'ITB' not 'PBI'!" But no, folks. PBI stands for Peanut Butter Incident. And we just had one in this hiz-ouse. Fortunately I'm totally anal, type A when it comes to preparing the night before my long runs, which is what I was just doing about five minutes ago. That's when I went to the pantry to retrieve my Jif Reduced Fat Crunchy Peanut Butter to set out for tomorrow morning when what to my wondering eyes should appear but a gaping whole in the designated peanut butter portion of our pantry! Gasp! Oh no, it can't be so! As I said, I'm totally anal, type A about this stuff and I just double checked yesterday to make sure we had some. Mouth agape, in a state of perplexity, I turned to Runner Boy who naively announced "Oh yeah, we finished that today. The kids and I have been housing on that stuff. It's pretty good. They looooove it." No doubt. These are the same wily runlets who down Power Bars and GU like there's no tomorrow. Thankfully, my totally anal, type A approach saved the day (or run) on this one and Runner Boy is remorsefully at the store right now replenishing my nutty stash.

By the way, I have been running this week. Just slacking on the blogging. Maybe because I didn't want to have to admit that I cheated on Tuesday's run and did three miles instead of five. At least they were fast, that counts for something right?

And, get this, we got a new cat this week and the runlets named him Miles. (Gee, are we running obsessed much?) Of course, they were probably tripping on GU at the time.

Oh yeah, tomorrow's run? Twenty miles. Wish me luck!

Today's (more like Tuesday's and Thursday's) Miles: 8
Total Miles: 401

It Was Golden, Johnny

What with multiple faculty meetings, tutoring sessions, and a David Byrne concert thrown into the mix this week, I decided to be prudent and do my longish mid-week run today and get it over with. Running Partner, amazing chica that she is, volunteered to rearrange her schedule as well and join me. Since we had ten miles on the menu--a fairly easy distance at this point but still one that takes some time--we chose to return to the old trail we used to run in the beginning of our training program. It was symbolic in a way to return to the site of our first-ever run together. And it was truly uplifting to note how far we've come in terms of our conditioning. As we crested the hill we used to dread, we looked at each other and said "Gee, that hill seems to have gotten a lot shorter!" (Well, we didn't actually say "gee" because we're not quite that dorky but it was somewhat similar I'm sure.)

The most amazing part of the run is that the sun started to set in our final two miles. Scary, yes, because we had on nary a speck of reflective gear, but amazing at the same time. We couldn't help but get all misty and note the symbolism of the sun setting on our run as we shared one of our last training runs together. It was beautiful.

Today's Miles: 10

Total Miles: 393

Fourteen and Feelin' Fine

I was totally not jazzed about today's run. Last night I went to bed at 8:30 because I've been so.frickin.tired all week. Then baby runlet woke me up at 5 a.m. and all I wanted to do was pull the covers over my head and stay in bed until lunchtime. Fortunately my running schedule has me on autopilot so I got up like a good soldier, filled my fuel belt, ate my GU, and headed out to meet Running Partner. I was literally mid-yawn when she pulled up to the curb.

We started nice and slow, just as the sun was coming up. Check that, the sun didn't actually appear until we finished the run. Thank you, cloud cover! At 98% humidity, the last thing you want to see is the sun. Who needs to add heat to that?!? So, I guess I mean we were just getting started as the sun should have been coming up. I'm sure it came up somehow, somewhere, but I sure didn't see it.

Oh, but I digress. My point today is that a run I was dreading turned out to be amazingly easy and uneventful. You'd think Running Partner and I wouldn't have much more to talk about anymore after all the hours we've logged side by side but somehow conversation never seems to lag. Today it helped that her Runner Boy was naughty, naughty this week and girlfriend had some venting to do! (Note to any men in the audience--if your wife calls you when you're at a strip club, take the time to step outside and answer the phone.) We also rescued a turtle and saw a ginormous dead frog. Hmmm, maybe it was kind of eventful after all.

Next week is the peak week of my training. Forty miles (total) on tap. Ack!



Today's Miles: 14
Total Miles: 383

Reunited and it feels so good...

One thing that really sucks about returning to work is that I now have to do all my midweek runs in the evening. This is no good for two reasons: 1)I'm already worn out before I even take my first step, and 2) I have to run by myself. A social creature like myself needs companionship. It's just plain cruel and inhumane to sentence me to such solitary exercise.

With that said, you can imagine my excitement when I arrived at the bus stop this afternoon to retrieve my oldest runlet and I saw Runner Neighbor decked out in tech gear. "Are you going for a run?" I asked with more excitement than I had hoped to reveal. "Yeah, I'm going out for six miles in about an hour," came her reply. I could not have been more euphoric if Santa Claus himself were standing there. BUT, wait 'til you hear this, I didn't just jump blindly at the opportunity. No, no, no. I only have five miles scheduled today and my darn tootin' legs are so tired that I'd actually rather run five miles by myself than add an extra mile and run with one of my best friends. So I said "Would you be willing to do five so I could go with you?" Thankfully she loves me, quirks and all, and agreed to shorten her run. It was glorious.



Today's Miles: 5
Total Miles: 369

The Show Must Go On

That's how I feel about running right now. Life doesn't stop for marathon training and marathon training doesn't stop for life. No matter how drained I am from maintaining my composure for eight hours while seventeen-year olds try to ferret curse words out of a word search, I still must run. ("Huge wood" was the best they got--I admit I had to pretend to write something on the board so they didn't see me laugh. Mature, no?) And, on the days that I weather the seventeen-year olds well, there's still the tutoring side gig with the boys in a group home at a local mental institution. I'll just let your imaginations run with that. Trust me, it's even more extreme. Still, I come home and run.

And so it is, with today's run accomplished, that I quickly update this blog so I can head out to the suburban ritual of consuming fruity, alcohol-laden drinks while gossiping and munching hor d'oeuvres--oops, I mean Bunko--and get on with life. (Y'all thought I was going to say "book club" back there, didn't ya?!?)

Today's (and yesterday's) Miles: 15
Total Miles: 364

Mascara, Mantras, and My Road ID

Apparently those are my three essentials when eighteen miles are on the menu. The Road ID is a no-brainer because, seriously, I might die of a heart attack on a run that long and someone has to be able to identify me after the criminals kidnap Running Partner.

As for the mascara, what's that saying? "Live fast, die young, and leave a good looking corpse." Gotta have the mascara on when the Road ID comes into play. I shudder to think what the EMT guys might say to each other without at least a little effort on my part. (You'd understand if you saw me at 5 a.m.)

Then, the mantras. I owe a big ol' smoocheroni to SuperCallieFragilistic for reminding me of this article when I sent out a desperate plea to all my running buds yesterday. I was beginning to question whether or not I had the mental fortitude to keep running for eighteen miles and was looking for all the help I could get.

Now for the report on today's run. I was trying to think of the perfect adjective to describe it and kept coming up blank. There were high points, low points, eventful moments, dull moments--but, overall, the whole was better than the sum of its parts. Oh sure, I could go on about the "BodyGlide stain" on my shirt that turned out to be blood, or the blisters the size of Texas between my toes. But why? Why focus on the negative that seems to come with any long run? I'd rather focus on the fact that I ran the entire time without stopping. I want to celebrate that I actually ran one of those miles at a 6:30 min/mile pace (we don't need to talk about why, just know it wasn't my GI issues for once!). And, I want to be proud that I get to go to our annual block party this afternoon, drink some beers, eat too much junk food, and brag about the fact that I ran eighteen miles today!

Today's Miles: 18
Total Miles: 349

It's Hard to Keep Up

And I'm not just talking about running. I knew life would probably get a little crazy when marathon training reached its peak but I wasn't quite prepared for the all-consuming reality. I feel like my life has become working and running--and not necessarily in that order. I actually ran home from work yesterday. I packed my running gear, wore my scary-short running skirt and "Hello, here I am" running tank to my faculty meeting, then hit the scorching city pavement for seven miles home. Uphill. Yeah, somehow there's no way to get home from the city without going uphill the whole way. And I had new Hopkins and Loyola students wandering around in lost packs to contend with. Fun, fun.

So that was yesterday. Today, a day when city schools closed early due to extreme heat mind you, I came home and cranked out three miles. I didn't wear my Garmin because to be frank I just couldn't handle the pressure.

Running Partner and I have eighteen miles on the schedule for Saturday. The same day Hurricane Hana is due to hit Baltimore apparently. Can anyone say Body Glide?


Today's (and yesterday's) Miles: 10
Total Miles: 331

Attitude is Everything

Runner Boy and I had a special Labor Day treat today. My parents came over to watch the runlets so we could run together for a change. Runner Boy is definitely improving as a running partner. That is, he's learning the rules:

1. You must talk and make conversation, at least most of the time--there are occasional exemptions for extreme hills and such
2. You must drop behind or run ahead when oncoming traffic approaches (rather than smush me to the curb)
3. Above all else, you must not complain. I don't need anyone's external bad vibes harshing my mellow, ya know?

Being the awesome spouse that I am, I let Runner Boy pick today's route; the only criteria I gave him was that it had to be at least eight miles. Quite giving of me, no? Therefore, is it in any way my fault that he picked a route that includes a mile and a half section of continuous intensely steep uphill?

Now me, I like some good hill work. Especially on a short eight-miler, I don't mind pushing it a little harder than usual. (Hey, did you notice that I just called eight miles short? Sick, eh?) Runner Boy, on the other hand, started cussing audibly about a quarter mile into the incline. Then he started groaning and it simply escalated from there. I don't remember what the precise final straw was that broke my forbearance but I believe it involved the invocation of God, Jesus, or some such deity. That's when I snapped. "Enough! Enough of your negativity!" I screamed silently, or not--details, details, who can keep track of it all? "I can't take it anymore! White flag! Keep your xi-poisoning words to yourself!" I think that last part was in my head. But I know this next part was out loud for sure "Repeat after me: I love me some hills! I love me some hills!" And repeat he did. And so we continued, all military boot camp-like, until we reached the summit. I think even the people washing their cars in driveways were inspired.


Today's Miles: 8
Total Miles: 321

Slow and Steady

When Running Partner and I set out for twelve miles today, in 91% humidity, neither one of us was feeling the running love. We pushed forward, heads down, not much conversation being exchanged. In fact, the few words we did speak were about how sick we are of running and how great life will be when the marathon is over. Sounds fun, doesn't it?

Then, about five miles into the run something magical happened. Running Partner stopped at a Starbucks to use the restroom and when we started running again she felt lightheaded. No, that's not the magical part! Sheeesh! The magical part is that we had to slow waaaay down so she could get her wits about her again. (I guess if I were a truly nurturing and supportive friend I would have urged her to actually stop running--but I never claimed to be perfect.)

Once we slowed down, the run suddenly became much better. I'd even dare call it fun and enjoyable. It's a lesson I've learned but often forget to put into practice: if the run sucks then I'm probably running too fast. Slow and steady may not actually win the race but it helps you finish with a smile. And joyful kittens bounding at your feet, and velvety rose petals floating from the sky, and the soothing aromas of lavendar and jasmine lingering in your wake. At least in my happy world.

Today's Miles: 12

Total Miles: 313

Parched

Ay, ay, ay...as I sit here (at 5:30 a.m. no less) prepping for this morning's long run I just realized I never recorded Thursday's run. I am keeping up with my running, I swear, I swear, I really am!

Thursday: I decided to run after work instead of in the pitch black of predawn after the previous day's experience. I know, call me a renegade. And, because I was getting all crazy with an evening run I decided to truly take it to the extreme and leave my Garmin at home. So I ran four miles at I have no idea what pace. It was wonderful in the beginning. I even found myself singing out loud to music again. However, when I walked out the door I had this nagging feeling that I was forgetting something. I kept reassuring myself that I just wasn't used to running without my Garmin and that's what was bothering me. It was about two miles into the run that I realized "Oh yeah, I forgot to drink some water. Today." From 6:30 a.m. that morning to 5:30 p.m. running time I had. not.had.one.single.sip.of.water!!!!! How does that happen?? Apparently this adjustment to a full-time job is harsher than I suspected. I kept hoping it would rain so I could drink the rain drops. All together now "Awwww, poor Runner Girl!"

Thursday's Miles: 4
Total Miles: 301

Fright Fest '08

Ne.ver. A.gain.

That's how I feel about this morning's run. I woke up at 4:50--that's right, ten minutes before the alarm I had set for 5 a.m.. I used to hate people like me. I still find it annoying, even in myself. I mean, waking up in the 4 o'clock hour?!? To exercise?!?! That's just obscene.

Well I totally jinxed myself yesterday by complaining about the darkness. Today's sky made yesterday's look high noon. It was so dark that I was literally trying to remember where the pot holes are and what stretches of road usually have the most potential-ankle-twister tree limbs in the way. Why doesn't my street have street lamps? For that matter, why doesn't Charles Street, one of the most highly traveled thoroughfares in the region, have any street lamps until you reach the city line? Isn't there some kind of law about road illumination? Apparently not.

I did have on my dorky reflective vest which provided some measure of comfort but it could only do so much when my already limited vision was made more so by the blinding high-beams of oncoming cars. And, why do people drive so fast at 5 a.m.? I kept having to reassure myself that the odds of encountering some random wacko on a killing spree about to ram his car into me was truly quite small. Still, I worried.

About five miles in I was thinking that I'm totally burnt out on running and am in dire need of a break. I've been training for a race of some sort since January 1st and I'm just plain tired. I even found myself wondering if I should just bag this whole marathon idea. Then, out of the gold and orange glow of daybreak, I saw Running Partner coming toward me from the opposite direction. Running Partner! My wonderful long-run buddy!! Fellow runner whom I have never before encountered on a midweek run. Crazy, eh? Whatever your religious/spiritual beliefs, you have to admit that's quite a coincidence. Here I am at the lowest point I've ever experienced in running and out of the blue my running partner crosses my path. Wow. Something magical was at play today. Needless to say I was instantly jerked out of my rut and found myself powering some 7 minute/miles the rest of the way home.



Today's Miles: 9
Total Miles: 297

Starry, starry night

This is what the sky looked like when I went outside this morning at 5:50 for my run. Gad!!! Have I ever mentioned how much I hate running in the dark? Tomorrow I need to squeeze in eight miles before work. I'm guessing that means out the door by 5:10 or so. Ugh, it's probably time to break out the dorky reflective vest I've been hoarding since college.

Today's Miles: 4

Total Miles: 288

"Bruised, Battered, and Bloodied"

Those are the three words Runner Boy used to describe me when I walked in the door after this morning's long run. It was an eventful run, to say the least.

Running Partner picked today's route and it sounded great in the abstract. We were to run from her house in Towson straight down to Baltimore's renowned Inner Harbor, turn around, (with the requisite stop at Mr. Running Partner's office for some amazingly delicious water-cooler water) and come home again. All good in theory, as long as you ignore the part where Towson essentially sits at the top of a huge hill and the harbor is at the bottom. That makes for a nice first half of the run but those last eight miles of nonstop uphill were nothing less than brutal.

There was also another little GI issue. Here we go, this is part where I start talking poop again and my mother nearly has a lack-of-propriety heart attack. RP and I were only about four miles into the run and I realized we were running right through a college campus. With some fear of jinxing myself and causing an event so traumatic RP and I might never recover, I asked "Hey, do you know where there might be a bathroom here?" She said we were among dorms and probably couldn't get in to any of the buildings. Then she graciously added "I totally don't mind if you want to go just cop a squat in those bushes over there. Seriously, I wouldn't even think twice about it." Well that's very nice and all but I had to do more than pee and when I told her so she replied with understandable resignation "O-oh." This led to an undoubtedly riveting discussion of various Starbucks locations and our course map. A discussion in which we were both so engrossed my attention was only diverted by an all-too familiar smell. I did a double sniff and announced with intense glee "There's a public restroom around here somewhere!" And so, as if delivered by the hand of God, there it stood: a porta potty! Ta da! After making sure RP would still respect me in the morning I bounded off to commune with construction workers' altar.

Everything went smoothly from that point on until about two miles into the return trip when my left foot spontaneously flew out of my shoe causing me to go tumbling and sliding across hot cement. That was fun. How the heck my shoe came off, I have no idea. It was still tied and everything. I mean, for real, has that ever happened to anyone else? After dusting off my wounded pride I put my shoe back on and tied it extra (read "too") tight. (Not a good idea as any experienced runner can attest.)

Things returned to smooth sailing--until the second fall. That's right, spaz attack here actually fell two times on today's run! I don't even want to talk about the second one. It occurred, it happened, it's over. I want my wubby, goddammit!!!! (She exclaims while rocking like a Russian orphan and maniacally twirling her hair.)

So, the good news: we ran, without stopping, except for my various issues and the most wonderful water in the world, for 16 miles and we maintained a 10:02 min/mile pace the entire way. Basically, we rock.

Hey, I just realized this post is a long as my run was!! :p

Today's Miles: 16

Total Miles: 284

Dog-gone Tired

This is basically how I felt for yesterday's run. Hey, can fatigue be my excuse for not blogging the run until 37 hours after it occurred? What the heck, I'm using it. I'm not sure whether to blame Wednesday's eight miles or the fact that my new classroom is on the third floor and I have to walk up and down all those steps about a padillion times a day. Whatever the reason, his heart or his shoes, I mean the long-ish run or the stairs, my legs were lead yesterday. But, the run's done. That's what matters in the end, right? Now if only I survive Sunday's sixteen miles. That should be cute.


Today's (actually Yesterday's) Miles: 4
Total Miles: 268

Back in the Saddle

In the immortal words of James Taylor, "Isn't it nice to be home again." And yes, it is. At least when it comes to running. Call me crazy but I missed my hills sweet hills. I've gotten accustomed to working different parts of my legs when I run and I found the flat land of the Eastern shore was not a friend to my knees. (There must be another James Taylor tie-in in that satement, eh?) Plus, Runner Neighbor is here. We reconnected after three weeks apart and it was wonderful to have all the catch-up talk as a distraction. I had eight miles on the agenda but she was only in for five so I dropped her off and did the last three on my own.

I hear there's a new neighbor who has run FIVE marathons. And she wants to run with me. Do I dare?!?!? Holy legitimacy, batman. Five marathons is way more hardcore than anything I've experienced. So daunting! (Although, Mrs. Semi-Hardcore herself here was up at 5:25 this morning for her run. That counts for something, right?)


Today's Miles: 8
Total Miles: 264

Oyyyy.....

Back from vacation and life is crazier than ever. While lounging on the sun-drenched shores of Maryland's eastern shore, I accepted a full-time job. That's right--stay-at-home Runner Girl is now working again. Ack!

But, more importantly because I do have my priorities in order after all, I ran 15 miles. That's right! 15 miles! New personal distance record for me. I have to say, it really wasn't too bad. My pace was slower than I would have liked but I chalk that up to vacation exercise malaise. Still, I ran 15 miles. Without stopping.

Oh yeah, there was this little incident when my iPod was run over by a mass-transit bus, but why focus on the negative???

Vacation Miles: 33
Total Miles: 256

Too Legit

Forgive me a few obnoxious moments here but I just got back from ten miles with Running Partner and am riding the proverbial runner's high. For the first time ever I feel like a legitimate runner. I'm usually plagued by a horrible inferiority complex whose little voice tells me I'm not fast enough, fit enough, hardcore enough. But as RP and I were winding down the last quarter mile of our run today she turned to me and said "I'm so glad we ran together because this run would have su-u-ucked if I had done it alone. It wasn't so bad though." And, lest the trickster spirits were listening, I cautiously whispered in reply, "I'd dare say it was easy." Easy?!?! Ten miles were easy?!?! Who AM I?

If you can call a ten-mile run "easy" you HAVE to be legit. At least somewhat.

Now, off to pack for vacay. Runner Girl, Runner Boy, and all three Runlets are headed downey ocean, hon.

Wish me luck on the solo fifteen-miler I have waiting next Saturday! (Yeah, the girl who can't stand to run three miles alone has to tackle fifteen. That should be interesting.)

Today's Miles: 10
Total Miles: 223

Six-Word Memoir

Runner's Lounge has issued the challenge to come up with six words that denote all that running is and means in our own personal worlds. I thought about trying to go lofty and esoteric with this one--then I stopped laughing, came to my senses, and decided on the following:

Are skinny jeans worth this pain?

There you have it, in all its shallow glory. I began running to lose weight after my third child. I keep running because I can't bear the thought of returning to that post-partum horror. It's all about the vanity here. Supposedly running has health benefits; tell that to Mr. Angry Left Knee who has been whining all day and Miss Mopey Left Ankle who feels threatened when she's ignored. Not to mention I pretty much feel like I'm going to have a heart attack at some point during every run. But then I come home, shower, and put on the same size jeans I wore in high school (maybe not exactly but close enough, alright?!?!) and it usually seems worth it in the end.

That and I've got a handful of other local crazies striving for the same goal. It's a demented but supportive sisterhood.

What A View!

After realizing that I was spending way too much time thinking about music and running, I decided to go back to my purist roots. I mean, I don't listen to music when I race, I certainly won't do it for the marathon, why do I need it to train? (Because it helps pass the time but I'm trying for something here so let me go with it, k?)

With four miles on the menu I figured it would be a good time to try out the new orthotic set-up Mr. Johnny Runlately at Local Running Store recommended. And without music or conversation to distract me, I set out with the intention of making today a "check in" run--where I commune with the environment around me and pay attention to my form, breathing, consciousness, etc. With apologies to the big R, I've runnified the adage "Speak softly and carry a big stick" to "Step softly and carry Mace" and I find that helps me pay attention to how much actual pounding my peds are doing. As for the Mace, I still need to get that. Thanks for the reminder though.

In the spirit of today's responsible approach to running, I actually included a cool down period. The running gods rewarded me, and how! As I was walking, sans headphones mind you, I heard another runner's gently striking footsteps behind me. I turned and there he was--{{sigh}}-- Adonis. With his golden hair flapping in his run-induced breeze. The only bare-chested man I've ever seen running who didn't trigger my gag reflex. Beauty personified. Runner Girl has a runner crush. And who can blame me? Adonis is so Adonis-y, I wouldn't be surprised if Runner Boy has a runner crush too. I'll have to ask him.


Today's Miles: 4
Total Miles: 213

"Running Hard"

That's the name of the playlist I made for today's 7-miler. Now, some of you may laugh (Running Moron?) but you all have to understand that my favorite genre of music is "folk" and I consider Aerosmith to be kind of crazy loud. That said, I'm about to reveal a secret that may shock those who know and love me. It's going to come out anyway when you see my playlist so I might as well just put it out there right away. Ready?? I like Megadeth.

With no further ado, I present "Running Hard"...

1. Southern Cross Crosby, Stills and Nash--Hey, you gotta ease into it!

2. Sweet Emotion Aerosmith--Live version, friends. It's a classic.

3. Hangman Jury Aerosmith--What does it say about me that I caught myself smiling during this song?

4. American Idiot Green Day--Surprisingly great beat for a run.

5. Symphony Of Destruction Megadeth--That's right. You got something to say?

6. Foreclosure Of A Dream Megadeth--I actually sang along. "Until all is lost, personal holocaust..."

7. Sweating Bullets Megadeth--Even I admit this song is creepy.

Let me interrupt this playlist for an announcement: The "alphabetical by artist" selection is not always the best choice in iTunes.

8. By the Way Red Hot Chili Peppers--Before you see the rest of this playlist you have to understand that my Running Partner said this is her favorite band for running music so I decided to try them out. Not great, but okay so far.

9. Around the World Red Hot Chili Peppers--Hmmm, still okay. Just okay though.

10. Parallel Universe Red Hot Chili Peppers--Nice background music for a car trip, party maybe, but I'm not digging it running-wise.

11. Scar Tissue Red Hot Chili Peppers--Waaaaaay toooooo sloooooooow. Crap! How many of these songs did I add?!?

12. Otherside Red Hot Chili Peppers--A little better. Still slow but I've resigned myself.

13. Under the Bridge Red Hot Chili Peppers--Dear God, horrid intense high school flashbacks! May it go away, mommy!

14. Tom Sawyer Rush--Now that's what I'm talkin' bout. Apparently I'm a redneck.

15. Renegade Styx--See comment above.

With all said and done, basically the playlist sucked. Training is a process though and you have to fine tune not just the running itself but all the other aspects as well. One thing I'm sure about after my last two runs is that I like peppy music I can sing along with. Dorky, I know, but it is what it is. Sure the Megadeth, Rush stuff was fun but I felt guilty afterwards, like I had eaten an entire tub of Ben & Jerry's or something.

Now, what to listen to tomorrow???

Today's Miles: 7
Total Miles: 209

Juiced

With Runner Neighbor on vacation this week I've been left to run on my own. (Insert "Awwww, poor Runner Girl!" now.) Not able to bear the thought of simply listening to myself struggle for breath, I decided to dust off the ol' iPod and create a new playlist.

With apologies to anyone with actual musical taste and discretion, I give you my 3-miler:

1. Born to Run--Of course! A no-brainer.

2. I Kissed A Girl--Like I said, apologies to those of you with taste.

3. Lose Yourself--Runner's World itself crowned this the number one running song of all time.

4. Stronger--"That that don't kill me can only make me stronger." Hello-o-o?? Hills?!?!

5. Don't You Want Me--Ummm, yeah, maybe it's an 80's thing?

6. Eye of the Tiger--It must have put me in the zone because I just had to double check what the last song was.

My average pace with RN has been about 9:15/mile. Today's pace: 8:32. Maybe there is something to this music thing.


Today's Miles: 3
Total Miles: 202

A Day In the Life...

Rather than write a long narrative today I’m going to post a list of events from the past twenty-four hours that mark how much running has impacted me and those around me. Don’t worry, I haven’t gone soft, just read on.

1. Yesterday at lunch with Runner Mama I didn’t even glance at the salad section of the menu. Way too few calories and carbs! I opted instead for the chicken cheese steak with a huge side of fries and ate it all without a morsel of guilt. Honestly, no guilt!

2. Last night, while watching Law & Order, I promptly turned it off as soon as it got to the courtroom part. With a dramatic yawn, I told Runner Boy that it was getting late and we could probably predict what would happen anyway. Off to bed--I mean, it was 8:45 after all.

3. On the advice of some Runner Buds (smooches, dingoes!) I found myself in the bathroom at 4 a.m. choking down half a Power Bar so it would have time to digest before my run. I had to keep my eyes closed and go into mole mode. It was the only way I could handle the idea that I was actually awake and consuming food at 4 a.m. Who does that?!? By keeping my eyes closed, I semi convinced myself it was just part of a horrible dream.

4. When Running Partner called at 6 a.m. to ask if we were still on considering the torrential downpour occurring outside, I immediately thought of that Power Bar and realized no way, no how was that going to have occurred in vain. I convinced her that running in the rain wasn’t so bad. Even if it is 13 miles. And you know what, it wasn’t so bad. Our Noah-like spirit was rewarded by only having to endure rain for the first half hour or so. This coming from the girl who used to run for the safety of the hamster wheel, I mean treadmill, every time it even threatened anything other than sunshine and roses.

5. When I got home from said 13-mile run, Runlet age 2 informed me that he had eaten the other half of my Power Bar. My first thought was “Thank God he didn’t eat my GU again. I’d hate to have to go the running store and restock today.”

6. After my shower I was feeling a little achy from hip to ankle on each side so Runner Boy, in his infinite vicarious wisdom, suggested an ice bath. I got the tub ready, climbed in, and realized it wasn’t nearly cold enough. Naturally I sent Runlet age 5 to fetch more ice packs from the freezer. I was belting out vintage Bon Jovi at the top of my lungs when she returned with six blue icy chunks clutched to her naked little tummy. “Thanks, hon,” I said, “Now close the door in case I say bad words.”

Ah, the wholesome 1950’s ain’t got nothing on this house!


Today’s Miles: 13
Total Miles: 199

What's That Smell?

So I wondered as I sat here at 5:45 this morning reading my email. Sniff. Sniff, sniff. Hmmm, that's kind of gross, I thought. Sniff, sniff, sniff. Hmmmm, that's an odor I would certainly categorize as "funky." Sniff, sniff, sniff, sniff. Hmmmm. No. Wait a minute. No. Yes! CRAP!!! That smell's coming from me! More specifically, my running clothes. Oh lordy, I've reached a new low. A new, disgusting, bottom of the barrel low. I mean, should my clothes really smell that bad BEFORE my run?!?! Ugh! I guess I need to start paying better attention to how much I'm wearing my gear between washings. Maybe I can get away with two runs for some items but not necessarily in this humidity. Just be glad your computer doesn't come equipped with smellivision. Imagine how they smell now that they're sweat soaked again! :)


Today's Miles: 3
Total Miles: 186

Gearing Up--Take 2

I'm almost embarrassed to admit it but I bought another pair of running shoes. Yeah, I don't need new shoes but I will before the marathon and the Brooks 90-day challenge seemed like a no-fail solution. You buy any new pair of Brooks, wear them for 90 days, and can get a full refund if you don't want to marry them at the end of the 3-month romance. So I wore mine for my run today. It was six miles, a distance I thought would be perfect to try out some new shoes--long enough for any potential problems to pop up but short enough as not to do permanent damage.

Well, let me tell you, a problem did pop up. Two of them. Blisters. Big blisters. Big, bulbous, angry blisters. On the sides of my feet; how weird is that?!? And my ankles kinda hurt. I guess it's destined to be a one-run stand for me and Brooks. So long shoes--don't call me, I'll call you.

I decided to try some Nuun today too. Post-run of course lest there be another sport bean incident. It's none (nuun?)-too-yummy but I'm not ready to abandon it altogether yet. What's the appeal with Nuun? The low calories? The tablets? And what do you do with those tablets when running? You're supposed to drop them in 16 oz. of water but my fuel belt bottles hold 10 oz. at the most. Can you mix it before you go?

So many questions, my poor little brain is smoking. Just like my inflamed, blistered feet.


Today's Miles: 6
Total Miles: 183

Calling All Roosters!

You would think the girl who got up before her alarm at 5:20 to run 13 miles just four days ago would have no problem waking up at 5:50 to run 3 miles today. You would think. Darn that alarm. It may have gone off once, maybe twice, before when I was laying there semi-awake just savoring the last few moments of quiet. But in those cases I was able to silence it at the first blip. Not today. That thing was squawking and squealing like a pig in a trap. A robot in a trap? No, I know, a soprano--the fat lady, opera-ending kind--in some kind of horrid medieval toe trap. And I couldn't silence it. Technically it's what you would call a "travel" alarm clock; in other words, it's tiny. What genius engineer thought that one up in the lab? "Hey, I know, let's make an alarm clock so small that you can't find the 'off' button." After dropping it three times, resetting the alarm for 8:26 p.m. and the actual time for 12:17 a.m., I somehow managed to quiet the mini beast. When I turned to the hubs with a look of abject apology all I could see was a semi-human form under a mound of covers. It must have been traumatic for him too.



Today's Miles: 3
Total Miles: 177

A Sneak Preview

Eventful run #2: Run and done!!

And it was a good one. Grab a drink, pull up a chair, and settle in because I have 13.1 miles of running to recap. That's right, baby, 13.1 miles! A half mary. Yeah, I ran a half marathon today just for the heck of it. The best part was that it was the first half of the official marathon course I'll be running in October. Now I'm not usually one of those people who needs to see a race course in advance but with 26.2 miles in my future I'd like to have some idea of what to expect. Today's run was supported by the local running store that's sponsoring the mary. There were probably a hundred or so people there. That's Running Partner's guestimate--I could never win one of those "Guess the number of jelly beans in the jar" games. There were several water stops along the way and I hear they had gels but we both had our fuel belts and kept going the whole time. Well, almost, but I'll get to that.

I set my alarm for 5:30 this morning to give myself time to eat half a PowerBar and tend to any potential GI issues. RP picked me up at 6:20 and we drove downtown. Her hubs works in a building that is blessed with a parking garage and he has weekend access so it was an easy scoot to the harbor where the run started. I mentioned I had a case of race nerves even though this wasn't really a race and she told me some blowhard at the pool last night told her "Are you running from point A to point B? Are other people running too? Do you know those other people? If not, it's a race. You better bring it." Asshole. I bet he slept until 9:30 today--by which time we were finished because we're basically awesome.

If you're familiar with Baltimore then you know that the harbor sits in a basin, a basin that is hard to escape without some major uphillage. When my Garmin read 4.2 miles and we were still going uphill, I found myself saying to the sweaty navy-shirt dude next to me "I've heard Baltimore is a challenging marathon but I didn't realize it was uphill the whole way." He mumbled something about training for the half and only running 6 miles today. I don't think he really wanted to chat.

RP and I kept a good pace if for no other reason than we were basically in the projects with no idea how to get out and we were afraid of losing sight of the runners in front of us. I've never felt so happy to see the train station in my life. At that point I knew, not matter what happened, I'd be able to find my way back to the finish. A nice straight shot down St. Paul Street.

With the harbor, and finish line, in sight, I was jubilant. What a great, easy run! My pride was swelling to epic proportions when I dared glance at my Garmin and realized we were only at 9 miles. Well crap! Oh yeah, I seemed to remember someone mentioning something about Fort McHenry at the start. While Fort McHenry itself is a beautiful, breezy running spot, the trek there from the harbor is decidedly not. Stinky is more what I'd call it. Hot and stinky.

At mile 10 we passed a water stop and with my fuel belt carrying mere splashes of bathwater at that point I decided to stop. What, no water?!?! Gah! Okay, I'll try a few sport beans. Bad idea. Very bad idea. I know my body doesn't tolerate sugar well but somewhere in that 10-mile haze I forgot that sport beans are made of sugar. I spent the rest of the run trying to balance my child-birth breathing techniques with basic gasping for breath in order to deal with the stabbing pain I was experiencing just under my ribcage. I managed to parlay my condition to RP in something that probably sounded like "Can't talk. Must breathe. Ouch." Unfortunately, she had to pee so stopping didn't really sound like the fair thing to do.

When we made it back to RP's hubs' office, we waltzed our drippy sweaty selves past the well-turned-out reception staff and headed toward the elevators with the promises of restrooms and water coolers on the horizon. Glorious, glorious water cooler. I could write a sonnet to that water cooler so enamoured I am of it's hydrating, ice cold gift. It was seriously the best water I've ever had, even if it did cause a slight brain freeze.





Today's Miles: 13
Total Miles: 174

Trails and Tribulations

Eventful run #1: Run and done!!

A few weeks ago I ran (no pun intended) into a woman at the local running store who told me about an intriguing group: The Dirty Girls Running Club. They meet every Thursday at 6 p.m. and run through the trails at a nearby park. I've always wanted to run those trails but being directionally challenged I had horrid images of myself wandering off path and withering Chris McCandless-like in the Baltimore wilderness. Hence, I liked the idea of following a group who knew where they were going.

I'm also kind of shy though so I was not digging the idea of being the only newbie running with these women. Running Neighbor to the rescue!! Not to be confused with Runner Neighbor or Running Partner, who both laughed at my proposal and responded with "Yeah, have fun with that."

I picked RN up at 5:40 and we got to the running store ten minutes later. The proprietor greeted us with the news that we had just missed the group and they had left early because they were doing 20 miles tonight. To which I responded "No way!" and he said "Yup." Then, after a waaaay too long pause, he started laughing and stated "Nah, I'm just kidding. They usually start closer to 6:15 than 6 o'clock." Ha, running humor. Not really funny unless you're devout enough to actually own a running store.

Long story short, the Dirty Girls never showed and Mr. Comedian proprietor ended up drawing a rustic, at best, map of the area and sent us on our way. Like Lewis and Clark we set out to find the trails and log a 6-mile run that ended back at the car rather than the middle of nowhere.

We did pretty well with RN as the navigator. For a trail run that began its first full mile on the shoulder of a crazy busy road at rush hour, it really was kind of cool. There were a few low points, like when I jumped at a black snake and almost pushed RN into said rush hour traffic and when RN got the shakes so bad we had to take a break and I was silently cursing myself for not bringing a cell phone because I didn't know if I had it in me to fireman-carry her back out to the road. Other than that, it was beautiful, cool, scenic, not too rooty, and the only dangerous wildlife we encountered was a small French Bulldog that yapped at our heels for a tenth of a mile or so. Aaaaah, yuppie wilderness.

Technically we only managed 5.17 miles, but that 5.17 ended right back at my minivan and we were none the worse for wear.


Today's Miles: 5
Total Miles: 161

Mama Said There'll Be Days Like This

TMI Warning: This post is not for the faint of heart, easily disgusted, or readily offended.

To capture the true essence of what happened today I think we need to begin yesterday evening around 5:30 p.m.. While I should have been at least in the beginning throes of preparing dinner for my family I was instead making a monster batch of chocolate-covered pretzels to give as a gift. I had two kinds of chocolate going and multiple sprinkle-ish toppings. It was glorious. And way too tempting to resist. In fact, when there was a knock on the front door around 6 o'clock I had to quickly wipe away any tell-tale traces of chocolate around my mouth before greeting the visitor. (The Avon lady, if you must know. My 5 year-old runlet found out they carry Hannah Montana wares.)

When 7 o'clock came and my husband asked what was for dinner, the best I could do was glance around my chocolate-spattered, sprinkle-riddled kitchen and shrug. His solution: buffalo chicken pizza.

Okay, NOT a good combination with all that chocolate. I was literally awoken at 1 a.m., 2 a.m. and 3 a.m. with horrible stomach cramps. When 5 a.m. came I decided to go ahead and get up and try to resolve the GI issue before my run. It took a little while but I finally thought I was all clear. I took some Imodium, ate my GU, and headed out to meet Runner Neighbor at 6:15--yeah, that's late in our world; she knew something was up.

I told RN my woes and assured her I felt okay to run and thought the route had enough bail-out spots that it wouldn't be an issue. Famous last words. I did actually feel pretty good for the first two miles or so but then I started to fade, quickly. Just as I passed my final bail-out spot, the shit hit the fan. So to speak. I honest to God thought I was going to have emergency diarrhea right there on Charles Street. The panic induced by the situation brought on a horrible wave of nausea. Now I wasn't sure which end I should be worried about. Heck, it wouldn't have surprised me if I had started bleeding out of my orifices as well. It was the.absolute.worst. moment in running in my entire life. I had to stop, calm myself down, and send RN ahead without me.

I wanted to collapse and curl in the fetal position on the side of the road. I couldn't bear the thought of forward motion. BUT I wanted to get home too and that was the overriding desire. I managed to walk the next quarter of a mile, taking deep breaths and visualizing a trauma-free return home. Eventually the panic subsided, the cramps diminished, and the nausea disappeared completely. When I has half a mile from my house I decided it would be better to run at that point and shorten the distance between myself and a bathroom, should the horror return.

Fortunately I made it home safe and sound. But with emotional scars I may carry for years. Now I can't help but wonder, what in the world do I do if that happens during a long run or a race????



Today's Miles: 3
Total Miles: 156

It's A Jungle, I Mean Sauna, Out There

Seventy-seven degrees farenheit and 85% humidity at 6 a.m.?!?!? What kind of subtropic zone have I fallen into? I feel like a modern day Rip Van Winkle, but instead of waking up years later I woke up in a new climate. A hot, humid one. The only consolation is that when it does eventually cool and the humidity abates the transition will be that much sweeter and more appreciated after trudging through this soupy mess.

Runner Neighbor and I met for our regular Tuesday run and it was fairly uneventful except that we hadn't discussed a route the day before, as we usually do, so we spent the first three minutes groggily looking at each other and fumbling for the words to express our ideas about where to go. There was even a bunch of expressive hand movements to indicate direction and hills. Apparently neither one of us is at the top of our communication game first thing in the morning.

There are two eventful runs on the horizon this week. Stay tuned.



Today's Miles: 3
Total Miles: 153

Easy, Breezy Puddin' Pie

I'm not sure when it happened but sometime in the last two months seven miles became a short run. Okay, maybe not short per se, but definitely not long. When I saw seven miles on the schedule for this weekend I was almost disappointed. Disappointed about running seven miles?!? The insanity. The problem is, I'm beginning to dig the drama, the "Wow!" factor, of the ten plus milers. Seven miles just doesn't seem to have the same oomph. With seven miles on the schedule, my lackadaisical approach was evident: I wasn't concerned about hydration the day before, I didn't feel the need to carb-load in advance, and, I even considered breaking my ultimate taboo--having some wine the night before a run.

And as I ran, it just seemed...easy. Yeah, seven miles has become easy. How in the heck did that happen????

Good thing I have next Saturday's twelve miles to put me in my place.

Today's Miles: 7
Total Miles: 150

Let's Do the Time Warp Again

Call Frank N. Furter because there’s some weird wacky stuff going on around here. For instance, last night I sat down at 8 p.m. to watch Click and Clack's comedy cartoon on PBS. (No, that's not the weird part.) The next thing I knew Runner Boy was waking me up at 9 p.m. to go to bed. I know, I know, shocker that I actually fell asleep watching PBS, but I like Click and Clack. For real. I will grant that their NPR show is better. But, I digress. Falling asleep before 9 p.m. is weird, unless you're under 5--maybe 10?-- or over 70.

Fast forward to this morning when I barely woke up before my alarm. We're talking "Oh crap, this thing is going to start squealing in one minute and wake the whole family if I can't figure out how to turn it off." Fortunately for Runner Boy and the sleeping runlets I was able to channel my inner Tom Cruise guy from Mission Impossible and get the job done. Now, after that many hours of sleep you'd think I'd awake fresh as the morning dew. Not so.

I don't if it was going to bed so early that threw me off or what but as I was walking to Runner Neighbor's house today I began to wonder if it was really only 6:10. In the short two tenths of a mile between our houses I saw three runners, a dog walker, and was passed by two cars. That may not be unusual in some areas but I never see anyone else that early around here. When I say I was wondering about the time, I'm not joking. I literally found myself trying to figure out if I had somehow slept in and we'd lost power and that's why the clocks were wrong. I even studied the sunlight to see if it seemed brighter than usual. To enhance the Twilight Zone atmosphere, Runner Neighbor wasn't outside when I got to her house. She came out about ten seconds later though and assured me it just happened to be an active day on the street. And she had been waiting for me outside earlier but decided to run in and blow her nose one last time before I arrived.


For previous readers: yes, I did do the extra 0.31 miles today AND I found myself pulling a few weeds as I was waiting for my Garmin to locate satellites.


Today's Miles: 3(.31)
Total Miles: 143

So Close, Yet So Far Away

When the revered Hal Higdon tells me, in an indirect way via a generic training schedule, but still, that I should run five miles today, then I should run five miles today. Five. Not 4.69. Apparently Runner Neighbor's five-mile route is actually 4.69 miles. In her defense, it is five miles from her house and back again. But it clocks in at 4.69 miles when we start at my house. I didn't know this when we ran it last week because there was some kind of Garmin issue and I didn't record the distance. Gah. I didn't look at my watch today until the run was over and at that point I seriously considered running another 0.16 miles up the street and back to officially tick past the five-mile point but then that seemed a little ridiculous. I'm trying to convince myself that it's okay to fall shy of the scheduled mileage now and again because I usually go over by at least a tenth of mile or more. It just sucks to not see that "5" at the front of today's distance read out. Rest assured that tomorrow's three mile run will actually be 3.31.



Today's Miles: (almost) 5
Total Miles: 140

Run, Sweet Run

Nothing much to report about today's run. Three miles at a comfortable pace, good route, yada, yada, yada. Except that I did need the alarm to wake me up for the first time ever (in running history, that is) and I was in the middle of some bizzaro dream about my losing my teeth. I'm pretty sure that's supposed to signifiy something. Off to Google.

Today's Miles: 3
Total Miles: 135

Where's Alec Baldwin When You Need Him?

I couldn't help but think of his Schweaty Balls routine when I came home from today's run. Not that I have balls; Dear God, I'd have much bigger concerns than whether or not I could fininsh a marathon if that were the case. But I did have sweat. A lot of it. And it was gross.

Sure I expect to get sweaty when I run. I mean it is mid-summer in the humid zone. Some sweat is only natural and to be expected. However, when I'm out and see the super-sweaters, you know who they are, I can't help but be a little put off and amazed. How could the human body lose so much water and still function?

When I feel I might possibly be venturing beyond the mild sweat zone, I picture myself in a Nike ad. One of the raw, gritty ones that seems to heavily feature black and chrome. The one where the model is absolutely dripping sweat but still manages to look stunning in her black sports bra and tanned, toned abs.

Unfortunately, there's this invention in life called a mirror and an inopportune glance at one can provide a jarring jolt of reality. Like what happened today when I got home.

Note to self: the purple sleeveless shirt, while cute, is best left for runs in the 3-mile range. The difference in purplish hue between dry and sweat-soaked is waaaaaay too disparate.


Today's Miles: 10
Total Miles: 132

An Auspicious Beginning

I gave myself two running-related birthday gifts today. First, I bagged my normal wake-up time and decided to run whenever I happened to get up naturally. Of course that meant waking up at 5:45 as usual then allowing myself to fall back asleep until Runlet #2, who was lying in bed next to me, exuberantly proclaimed an hour later "My eyes are open!" Second, I finally went searching for the "mile-long" trail that meanders through a local retirement community. It was supposedly replete with labeled trees, a foot bridge, small cemetery, and pristine fine gravel pavement.

Now you'll notice that I put "mile-long" in quotation marks. That's because this mythic trail, that everyone swears is a solid mile, was actually 0.6 miles according to my Garmin. Hmmm, so much for my planned route of lapping it twice and going back home. With some quick thinking and not-so-quick footwork I set out in a new direction to add the needed distance.

I came home with 3.13 miles on my Garmin and reservations in my head. No, not dinner reservations--I have three kids, silly. My reservations were based solely on that .13 hanging out on the edge of today's distance. Unfortunately, I have a major case of triskaidekaphobia, fear of the number 13. It's at an obsessive level. When I walked in the door I found that my wonderful husband had taken the kids to get some celebratory Starbucks. I tried push that 13 out of my mind and focus on showering or such. But no dice. When the fam walked in I immediately blurted out that I had run 3.13. "That's not going to be unlucky, do you think?" I asked. And knowing me the way he does, my husband replied "Go back out there and change the distance." So I did, bringing today's miles officially to 3.33. Much more auspicious, grasshopper.



Today's Miles: 3
Total Miles: 122

My Hands Felt Just Like Two Balloons

Ugh, the underfueled run. It's been a while since I ran 5 miles during the week and today I learned a powerful lesson: a light summer dinner (read "mostly vegetables") is not sufficient fuel for a 5 mile run the next morning. Especially since having to work last night forced me to eat in the early bird hour. Seriously, the clock might have officially read 4-something when I sat down. In retrospect I should have taken a snack to work with me or had one when I got home.

Now I know, right? I can laugh at the Pink Floydian experience now but I honestly thought I might pass out this morning. Fortunately we were only about a quarter mile from home at that point and it was mostly downhill the rest of the way. Sure, I had little black dots closing in on my field of vision and my hearing was a little wonky but I somehow convinced myself that steady forward motion was the best option. Poor Runner Neighbor had no clue what was going on until we finished. I don't even remember what I said to her but I know I somehow communicated my near-bonk condition. I'd call her later to find out my actual words but I think that might scare her too much.

The ironical thing (special nod to Christopher Guest) is RN and I probably had one of our best runs in terms of pace, conversation, and route. If I could Magic Erase the last third of a mile it would have been perfect.

Oh yeah, I somehow forgot to start my Garmin today. And I didn't even care. That's how bad it was.


Today's Miles: 5
Total Miles: 119

Grrrrrr...

Picture me banging my head against a brick wall then throwing my Garmin on the ground and hopping on it Yosemite Sam-style. That's how I feel right now.

Runner Neighbor and I met for our Tuesday 3-miler this morning but I was just a tad late due to some minor GI issues. (Regular readers will understand that by a tad late I mean I was out the door at 6:12 for our 6:15 rendezvous.) RN, as expected, was waiting patiently at the bottom of my driveway. In the interest of not making her wait any longer than she already had, I buckled my Garmin and hit the power button hoping it would find the satellites quickly. I usually set the coddled watch outside about 5 minutes before I'm ready to head out myself so it can leisurely do it's thing without any undue pressure. Well, apparently it needs that kid-glove unhurried time because those satellites we not being located while we were running. I gave up and turned it off after a few tenths of a mile.

It must have been around mile 2 that I mentioned to RN that we were either running really fast or the humidity was taking its toll because I was struggling to hold up my end of the conversation. Typical mid-Atlanticer that I am, I placed the blame on the humidity.

At the end of our runs I typically pace around the backyard for a few minutes to cool down. I find it helps minimize the horror for the runlets who eagerly await the return of the sweaty, panting beast that is their mother after a warm-weather run. But today their fear/disgust was not at the forefront of my mind. As any good runner knows, the only sight in my tunnel vision was the time on the digital clock. The same clock I glanced at as I walked out the door. And there it was, in its green LCD glory: 6:36.

That means we ran 3 miles in 24 minutes. Actually less than 24 minutes because you have to account for the initial "Hi, how's it going? Blah, blah, blah..." and the final "Well, I'll talk to you later. Yada, yada, yada..." But how much less? A minute? Thirty seconds? Gah!!!!! I could possibly have run 7-something minutes per mile today?!? But I'll never know?!?

Back to my head banging.


Today's Miles: 3
Total Miles: 114

Feel the Burn

Today's 9-miler was one for the ages. I was well-fueled with half a Power Bar 40 minutes before the run and "Just Plain" GU at mile 4. The route was scenic, the conversation flowed, and overall the the entire outing was easy and uneventful. What more could you ask for?

In fact, I still was basking in the glow of a run well-done about ten minutes after returning home when my Napoleonic 3-year-old runlet commanded through her mouth full of Mighty Bites "Go shower! I no wanna smell your stinkies!" Such is the life of a mom on the run.

Appropriately submissive parent that I am, I headed immediately for the shower. Since the run was so uneventful, and hence not juicy blog fodder, I thought the shower might provide a nice opportunity to reflect and see what kind of topic bubbled to the surface. Then it hit me. Literally. Or, more specifically, the shower stream hit my lower back where apparently my Fuel Belt had been chafing me during today's run. Yowwwwweeeeee!!! Is there anything else like that initial burn of water hitting a chafed spot? Especially on your back where you don't even realize you've been chafed? It's a sneak attack, a sniper in the shower stream. Sure the pain subsides as the shower progresses but the damage has been done. I couldn't help but send a silent prayer of gratitude that Dick Cheney is obviously not a runner (he's had 4 heart attacks, Big Brother, hold your charges of treason) because there's at least one potential form of torture flying under his radar.

And with that, I'll sign off. ;)


Today's Miles: 9
Total Miles: 111

An Added Benefit

In preparation for some, shall we say "festive", July 4th celebrations, Running Partner and I wisely decided to postpone this weekend's long run to Sunday. That gave me the option of doing my cross-training today or taking two rest days in a row. When I woke up from said festive celebration, two rest days sounded pretty good. However, as the day wore on and rehydration occurred my legs started to feel kind of twitchy. Obnoxious, I know, but apparently I don't like to rest two days in a row. So what to do? I have to run 9 miles at 6:30 tomorrow morning so I couldn't do anything too strenuous but I was getting seriously agitated and grumpy just sitting around. The solution: a stroll. A wholesome workout befitting this Rockwellian holiday. Although I doubt Norman Rockwell was a Rapper's Delight kind of guy. It is a fun strolling song though, you should try it some time. As I was gaily mosying through my neighborhood, I noticed that my sunglasses were becoming more and more unnecessary. Not good because the sun wasn't due to set for at least another hour and a half. Then I noticed the leaves were doing that weird curling up thing they do when it's about to rain. Doubly not good. Then I felt a rain drop. Sugar foot, that had not been in the plans and I have major issues about getting my running shoes wet, especially less than twelve hours before a 9-mile run. So stroll turned into sprint. Sure there was a brief moment of "Hello, Mr. Quadricep. I hadn't realized you were along for the ride." But I found my groove quickly. And it felt good. It felt good physically to let my legs get a little running action and it felt good mentally to know that I didn't have to get stuck in the rain if I didn't want to. I made it home dry, albiet a little sweatier than I had expected, and ready for tomorrow.

Left at the Altar

Melodramatic, I know, but that's what I thought as I waited for Runner Neighbor this morning. We were scheduled to meet at 6:15, which equals 6:05 in RN language, so when I stepped out my door at 6:07 I fully expected to see her sitting on the stone wall waiting patiently. But, she wasn't there. Unusual? Yes. Cause for panic? No.

I decided to start walking toward her house. A logical choice anyway since she lives exactly 0.19 miles from my house and I was harboring a little concern about our planned route being a smidge shy of the 3-mile mark. As I approached the bend that serves as the halfway point between our two houses, there was still no sign of her. That was when I could feel my heart-rate increase. Time to panic? Not yet, but soon.

Mr. Dog-Walking Guy was coming toward me from the direction of RN's house. "Look calm," I thought, "It's perfectly normal that you're out here in a running skirt and Garmin just nonchalantly strolling through the 'hood at 6 a.m. Damn, if only I could whistle!" I must have been sending out some weird vibe because he actually crossed to the other side of the street to avoid me. (I'll pretend he was worried about his dog going all Cujo or something.)

I was perilously close to RN's driveway at this point and still no sign of her. I silently cursed myself for not at least turning on my watch so I would know how much time had elapsed. I mean, were we looking at 6:10 or 6:12? This was important in my freak out factor! I didn't want to actually reach her driveway because that just seemed awkward. What if she was up but she forgot? What if she was still sleeping and her husband saw me loitering around the joint like a stalker? Time for panic? Yes! Indubedably!

I was trying to decide if I should slow my walk even further or actually turn around and go home. If I went home I could check the time and see if it was late enough that I should just go out on my own. Yeah, that seemed like the best option. So it was, about 6 feet from her actual driveway, that I decided it was time to turn around and head back. But I had to do it quickly in case she came out and saw my retreating figure. Now that would be awkard!

Wait--was that a flash of hot pink??? Sweet Jesus, yes! It's her! She's here! I haven't been abandoned afterall!!

"What are you doing here? I thought we were leaving from your house," she innocently proclaimed.

"Eh, I was worried about it not being quite 3 so I thought it was best to come here," I replied.


Today's Miles: 3
Total Miles: 102

The Runner in the Mirror

One of my goals with this blog is to get to know more about myself as a runner--the good, the bad, and the ugly. Well, one aspect has certainly come to the forefront, and it ain't purty. Ya see, apparently I like punishment.

In light of Sunday's gym experience and my just-completed run, it's difficult to argue otherwise. When Runner Neighbor and I set out this morning, I innocently thought it was just another run, no big deal. I had told RN my chosen route last night and she hadn't said anything. Fast forward to a mile into today's run and she says "Have you run this route before?" Hmmm, do I detect a note of something in her voice? I told her I had run it before, several months ago, and, now that I was thinking of it, the that last few times I've run it I've done it in reverse. This came out in a pant because we were still going uphill. In fact, we had been going uphill since we started. That's uphill for practically a mile. She offers that she's done it in reverse a few times too but only in the direction we're headed one time. Because of the hills. She had avoided it after that. "You do realize," she offers, "this way is a hell of a lot hillier, right?"

Now, did I realize that? That is the question, isnt' it? When planning the run I had told myself that Charles Street was much more scenic and hence would make a better ending route, like a carrot dangling on a proverbial stick. I thought it would be nice to get the short streets over with and save the long stretches for later. But, if I'm being truthful, I also remember thinking the run just seemed a tad too easy the other way. Those long stretches had too much downhill. Dare I say, I even thought we might get bored. So I automatically reversed the route in my head. Then I dragged my poor friend out today for four miles of continuous hills, mostly the upward fashion somehow.

It's a wonder people still talk to me.



Today's Miles: 4
Total Miles: 99

If My Life Were A Book...

right now it would be a twisted human version of the Berenstain Bears and Too Much Vacation. That's how I felt this morning at least when I woke up at 5:45 for today's run. I haven't been up that early to run in over a week and a half and it showed. Sure, I was up that early last week but only because baby Runlet couldn't seem to sleep past sunrise. But last week I was indulging in Diet Coke and buttery scones not strapping on running shoes before 9 a.m. Of course, last week I also wasn't going to bed at 9 p.m., even 8:45, like I have every night since I've been home.

So bleary-eyed and sheet-marked I stumbled out the door this morning to meet Runner Neighbor for our Tuesday run. I found her weeding her front lawn. At 6 a.m. I told her I was tired, trying to recover from vaycay, excuse, excuse, excuse, as I took off on legs I didn't know I had. I felt so good I didn't dare look at the Garmin until I turned it off in the safety of my own driveway. 3.1 miles in 27:08--an 8:45 pace. Not too shabby, especially considering we talked the whole time. I mean we haven't seen each other in over a week for goodness sake! Girlfriends gotta catch up.

Maybe soon I can stop obsessing about that horrible 10K showing. That's not really the runner I am. How long until I can convince myself??


Today's Miles: 3
Total Miles: 95